By: Dennis P. Carman, President & CEO of United Way of Greater Plymouth County
It’s funny sometimes where you find inspiration. More than twenty years ago, I was asked by a colleague if I would be interested in teaching a class at Stonehill College on Group Counseling for Substance Abusers. In the very scholarly textbook for the class, The Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy by Irvin D. Yalom in Chapter 1, “The Therapeutic Factors” under the subheading ALTRUISM, I found the following story:
“There is an old Hasidic story of a rabbi who had a conversation with the Lord about Heaven and Hell.
‘I will show you Hell,’ said the Lord, and led the rabbi into a room containing a group of famished, desperate people sitting around a large, circular table. In the center of the table rested an enormous pot of stew, more than enough for everyone. The smell of the stew was delicious and made the rabbi’s mouth water. Yet no none ate. Each diner at the table held a very long-handled spoon–long enough to reach the pot and scoop up a spoonful of stew, but too long to get the food into one’s mouth. The rabbi saw that their suffering was indeed terrible and bowed his head in compassion.
‘Now I will show you, Heaven,’ said the Lord, and they entered another room identical to the first—same large, round table, same enormous pot of stew, same long-handled spoons. Yet there was gaiety in the air, everyone appeared well-nourished, plump, and exuberant. The rabbi could not understand and looked to the Lord. ‘It is simple,’ said the Lord, ‘but it requires a certain skill. You see, the people in this room have learned to feed each other!’
This story blew me away when I first read it, and it has stuck with me. In fact, several years back I shared this from the podium during our Annual meeting of our United Way. We gave everyone in the room a wooden spoon to remind them of this wonderful tale.
We need our family, our friends, and our neighbors, and they need us!
How simple and straightforward is that? As much as I have always appreciated the critical role of people who provide health and human services, I’ve often wondered if we were all better at helping each other by feeding each other, sheltering each other, teaching each other, encouraging each other, and caring for each other, then our work in the caring professions would be made so much easier.
Look for help and ask for it when you need it and be ready to help when others need your help. Please, feed each other!
Community Voices for Health 