RESILIENCE!!

Posted on by Monica Hines

By: Marsha Weiner, LICSW, Manager of Behavioral Health Services, Signature Healthcare

Having spent many years in the field of mental health and social work, it has always been clear that some people are able to bounce back from trauma, stress, and difficult situations, while others really struggle to move forward.  

In other words, some are more resilient than others. 

What is resilience?

The dictionary definition is as follows:

Many years ago I attended a workshop about resilience in children.  One line stood out that I will never forget.  The question: why are some children who have experienced trauma more resilient than others? 

Answer: those children that had an important person/mentor in their lives, were able to experience positivity, were more apt to be resilient, and move forward in a positive way.  What a concept! Positivity brings positivity!

An article by the Mayo Clinic states “Resilience won’t make your problems go away — but resilience can give you the ability to see past them, find enjoyment in life, and better handle stress. If you aren’t as resilient as you’d like to be, you can develop and learn skills to become more resilient.” (Source: https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/resilience-training/in-depth/resilience/art-20046311)

Acknowledging that there is a problem/issue and identifying that it is causing turmoil in one’s life is the first step to developing the skills to work through it rather than let it be all-consuming and take over. 

“If you lack resilience, you might dwell on problems, feel victimized, become overwhelmed or turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as substance abuse, eating disorders or risky behaviors.” (Mayo Clinic: https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/resilience-training/in-depth/resilience/art-20046311)

Everyone experiences stress and adversity, those that are resilient choose to face the problem and not let it get the best of them.

Resilience is made up of five pillars:

  • Self-awareness
    • Knowing your own strengths, weaknesses, emotions, and motivations
  • Mindfulness
    • Being fully present, aware of where you are, what you are doing
    • Not overly reacting to what is going on around you
  • Self-care
    • The practice of taking action to maintain or improve one’s health
  • Positive Relationships
    • Having healthy, positive relationships
    • Surrounding yourself with supportive and positive people
    • Being supportive of others
  • Purpose
    • Recognizing that we belong to or serve something bigger than ourselves
    • We can find purpose in our faith, family, political party, or community

Recognize Your Own Resilience 

Resilience is marked by an ability to manage emotions in the face of stress.

This doesn’t mean that resilient people don’t experience strong emotions such as anger, sadness, or fear. It means that they recognize those feelings are temporary and can be managed until they pass.

Skills/techniques to move towards resilience:

  • Reframe Negative Thoughts
    • Focus on the positive things you can do
    • Trying to not dwell on the negative
  • Seek Support
    • Seek out those that are supportive, positive people in your life
    • Speak with a therapist
  • Focus on What Is Within Your Control
    • What are you able to do
    • Develop realistic, attainable steps
  • Manage Stress

It is the choice that one makes of how to react, develop, and use skills to best move through this setback, bounce back and move forward.

https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/10-simple-steps-to-help-destress

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